Death is a strange thing. Well, maybe not in itself, but the way people react to it would be a more accurate statement. It can bring either the best or worst in people.
It can also get one thinking about their own life.
To be honest, those that know me know that I have never held much stock in my own life. I have my reasons, reasons that are known to the people who need to know.
I'm not close to that many people. Those I was closest to, with the exception of one (well,to be fair, one and a half..), are all gone now, with the passing of my great-grandmother.
4 years ago, I lost my grandfather. It was a very difficult situation, watching someone go to 100% healthy to passing away in 10 months time. He had a rare form of cancer, mesothelioma, which basically sits dormant for years, and isn't diagnosed until its beyond treatment. It was a very painful loss for me, and can still bring me to tears even these years later, at the slightest fond memory or reminder of him.
2 years ago, I lost my grandmother, Carol, who coincidentally never got anywhere near over the loss of her husband two years earlier. They had been together since high school, almost 60 years, so you can understand why. It was basically the equivalent of a horrible waiting game, watching her deteriorate. I was fortunate enough to spend a week with her, shortly before she passed. It was a week of traveling from hospital to hospital, accompanying her to dialysis, so on and so forth. Needless to say, she was just over it. Less than a week after I last saw her, she was gone. This was like losing my mother, as she is the closest thing I had to one.
8 months after that, I lost my other grandmother, my mother's mom. I loved her very much, as was very sad to lose her. At the same time, there was a degree of relief for her, because she had been sick for as long as I could remember. I hated that she had to suffer with it, and am infinitely grateful to my aunt Estelle for taking care of her.
That should catch us up now, right?
Yes.
I've spent the last week, just being home, thinking about things like the no-direction route my life is trying to continue taking. Or the fact that I have friends almost half my age asking me the same question the friends I've had for years are constantly asking me...
"Why the hell are you wasting your time working at these shit jobs? You are way too smart for this shit."
Yeah, I fucking know that.
Thing is, if you know me, you know I go out of my way to live my life as simply as possible, and I'm pretty damn good at it.
It's kinda boring though.
Plus, you gotta keep having jobs at restaurants, gas stations, etc. Also boring, and way too much drama.
I'm so over it.
So I decided to fully pursue something that I have wanted to do since I was a teenager. Hell, it's something I literally trained to do all through high school.
As of this afternoon, I officially began the process to join the military, the U.S. Army to be exact.
To be fair, this will be a shock to some, but not to others. To save time, no, there will be NO talking me out of this. Unless they reject me, (VERY unlikely lol), it's a done deal. If you truly care about me, you will be part of my support system, otherwise....
...ssshhhhhhh.
The time frame they have me slated on right now is 6 weeks. Yes, just 6 weeks.
That's what happens when you score off the charts on the ASVAB...lol
They are practically falling over themselves to get me ready to go.
Losing all that weight really sped up this process.lol
I'm actually quite excited about the whole thing....well, except the fact that I will be mostly out of contact for the 9 weeks I'm at BCT. Pffft, you'll live.lol
Besides, if I take a notepad or so with me, I can still write, and transfer it all to this blog after graduation.
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