It seems to be a recurrent theme in my life, but I always find a way to work around it. It's work though, believe me. I try not to complain much about it, because one thought always seems to be floating around in my head.
As bad as it is, someone out there has it far worse than you do.
I have the world's most awesome friends, brothers and a sister I adore to pieces who love me back, school makes me happy and I'm good at it, and in general life is okay. The issue I'm having right now is of a financial nature.
See, I've been taking care of myself since I was 12 years old, and have "officially" been working since I was 14. I've never had to depend on anyone for anything, and with my work record, it has never been an issue to find a job. My attitude about work has always been if you are willing to work, it's not hard to find a job. What do you do though when you get fired from a job because your boss at the time was throwing a drunken tantrum, and filled out the paperwork as having terminated you for insubordination, saying that you threatened to quit and it was because it affected the moral of the co-workers? What do you do when that affects you getting a job elsewhere, because of your absolute refusal to lie, and you state you were fired from your last job, knowing it could keep you from even getting a call back for an interview? What happens when this development makes you have to file appeals with unemployment and you have to wait over two months to see any of the money you have spent years paying into the system, with no end of the bullshit in sight?
It mentally wears a person out, believe that.
I spoke to my case worker lady just two days ago, and she stated that I should be seeing my money by today. When I called her back this afternoon to ask her why it wasn't in the bank yet, all I got was an "Oops, I didn't notice this, you will have to wait for the decision from your appeal to come through the office before you will receive payment." To which I stated as nicely as possible in all the conversations I had with her over the last three weeks, she failed to mention this. Of course she just said sorry, there was nothing she could do, I just had to keep waiting.
Must be nice to be casual about a situation like this when you don't have to worry about where your money is coming from, eh?
So I will continue to fill out my applications, but I still refuse to lie about how I left my last job. I just have to hope that my work record before that will be enough to get them to call me back so I can get hired and not have to deal with the fact that the system has failed me completely.
I don't let anyone win over me...nobody.
All this situation has really inspired is me keeping to myself until things improve, as I don't want to take my mood out on anyone else. I almost didn't even go to school today over it, but luckily my favorite teacher convinced me that wasn't the way to go and talked me into going to class. Luckily I also have the support of one of my best friend's, who also has my back in the situation and is trying to keep me positive about it.
Sometimes, just sometimes....it's really hard not to give up.
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