A New Beginning

Sometimes I wonder what it would like to be normal.

Then I laugh hysterically and remember I wasn't meant to be like everyone else.  I also realize that is just the way I like it.

I rarely sleep. Sleep is for dead people!!

I'm more capable of being myself behind this keyboard than I am when I'm face to face with people.  I have a general distrust for most of existence, it's just easier to keep my mouth shut when I'm outside the four walls of my room.

I love most of my family and all my friends, but still tend to keep my distance.  Trusting the right people has never been my strong point in life.  What can I say, I'm a sucker like that.  Luckily I have one of the most awesome groups of friends in the world and they are willing to put up with my eccentricities because they love me.

I miss this part of my life more than I realized.  Doing this writing thing I mean.  It was the way I used to express myself best and I was damn good at it.  I had a pretty good following and even had offers to be sponsored and paid to do it.

Things happened, I gave up a lot of stuff I shouldn't have and now here we are. It's like....fuck sakes....a little over 3 years later and I believe I might be ready to take my life back.  To some degree at least.

It's time to concentrate on the few things I have left that make ME happy.

Number 1 is this blog.  While my original still exists, I will no longer add to it.  I may go back for occasional notes and sections of writings that deserve rehashing, but other than that, I will likely not lead people to it.  Too many memories of things I don't want to deal with and frankly toward the end, too much fucking whining.

Not really cool with that...

Major number 2, and just as important as number 1, is my gaming.  Yes, I'm a gamer...MASSIVE gamer to be more precise.  As one who dealt with major trauma during actual childhood and who had to be an adult by age 7, I have regressed.  I am currently living through my missed childhood and will likely continue to do so until they put me out to pasture.  By that I mean my friends who have been left in charge of my "end of life" rituals of nonsense put my ashes in a Folger's can and attempt to toss me out to sea 'Lebowski style'.

My apologies to whomever gets the blow back.

So now I take back what I can of my life and live for no one but myself and fuck whoever can't deal with that.  My life is about my writing, my gaming, listening to my music, going to concerts, travelling, and the variety of little things that make me happy.  To my family (sister, brothers, my niece, my pops, my dad, my mama) and friends that I adore and would give my life's blood for, I will always be here for all and any of you when you need me.

So for those who happen upon this, those I lead here, etc, be prepared.  I swear like a truck driver (thanks Dad), share the music I love, post random shit and funny stories, rant when the need arises, and do my best to entertain.

After all, isn't there some saying about "sharing is caring", or some such shit??